A Searcher’s Dilemma

Static, I feel.

Enslaved by my inabilities.

Thus I am striving,

I am pursuing.

 

Pursuing dreams,

Dreaming for a better life,

Living for the chase,

Chasing but not finding.

 

Down and desperate,

I sit and wonder…

 

Suddenly, jolts of Buddha Dharma strike me.

 

Am I really static?

No, indeed I am impermanent.

Like a flowing river heading towards the sea.

Dynamic and ever-shifting, I am.

 

Being static is a mere illusion,

Like clouds it gradually fills my mind.

Thus I meditate on the wind like impermanence.

And realize that the wheel of life is always turning.

Whether I want, feel, sense it or not.

 

Then I realize that my inabilities,

Don’t actually enslave me.

But my incessant striving does.

It prevents me to flow with the currents of the river of life.

 

Why swim against these currents?

It is an attempt doomed to failure.

Just stop, take a deep breath and let the currents propel you.

Into your unknown true path.

Poem “Finding Oneself”

Over the last few weeks, I have been having much trouble trying to find a potential career path or decide what to do in life. Most my friends that finished college with me have found a job for themselves. Some happy, some not. I look at myself and I still search for my path in life. For my calling… Yet I have realized that maybe I already know what I want to do with my life but I just don’t accept it because I am afraid. This poem is an attempt to share these hard, critical moments of self-reflection…

I gaze in void,

I shyly peak inside.

What do I see?

Vines and vines covering the inner self.

 

I try so hard to find a path

Yet the path is right in front of me.

Maybe life’s quest is not to find myself

But only to accept myself for who I am or who I am not.

 

For searching is walking in circles,

Hoping to stumble at the center one day.

For accepting myself is to allow the Universe

Guide me into the center of the Infinite possibilities.

 

Yes, I am realized that my path lies in becoming an aspiring artist, writer and educator. It is the same reason for creating this blog. It is a step into the unknown. I wish that you readers shall find your path to happiness.