The Song of Dissolution

This is a song inspired by the melody of ‘Fukaki Umi No Kanata’ (Beyond the Deep Sea) by Yoshida Brothers. Feel free to read this song while listening to the melody or sing it… Hope this song inspires you to travel into the depths of your heart. Bon Voyage! All the best for your own internal searching.

 

Many seas I’ve crossed

Many ports I’ve reached

In my little

Imperfect boat

Of body and mind

Guided by the light of Heart

 

Oh a storm is coming

All is about to overturn

Perhaps I will finally realize that

 

From the sea

I rise

Into the sea

I fall

Like a little wave

In it dissolved

 

There is nowhere to go

For all is the Sea

Just let it Be

 

Wherever the currents lead me

I’ll go

Wherever the fishes call me

I’ll be

Back to the shore

I’ll return

Wave after wave

 

Oh the world is big

Yet so small

Oh time flows fast

Yet so slow

So I sing this song

 

From the sea

I rise

Into the sea

I fall

Like a little wave

In it dissolved

 

Sometimes my ego builds

My mind wanders

And I ask myself

Where shall I go next?

Is it New York, Lisbon or Rio?

Is it Gantou1, Paris or Tokyo?

Then I realize Being

And ego dissolves in itself

 

No more searching for the Sea

For I am already part of It

No ‘I’ to feed

No ‘mind’ to free

No fear

No worries

No attachments

No space

No time

Nothing at All

Yet Everything at the same time

So I sing this song

 

From the sea

I rise

Into the sea

I fall

Like a little wave

In it dissolved

 

Like a little wave

In it dissolved

 

Like a little wave

In it dissolved

 

  1. Gantou is my ancestral village (now a small town) in China where my grandparents and some relatives live. It is located on the margins of the Ou River, in the southeast part of the Zhejiang Province.

Letter to Ma

Here I am sitting in a Portuguese church in India. Far away from you Ma, you who are now in Portugal.

I remember from the depths of my heart that you were the angel who introduced me to the teachings of Lord Jesus Christ. And here I am attending a Sunday Mother’s Day mass in a Portuguese church in India. The head priest holding the mass called all mothers to join him near the altar in an act of Celebration of Mother’s Day. All the mothers here for the Sunday mass, stood up and one by one, walked to the front of the altar to join the priest. Some confidently went and some were hesitant to go so the assistants had to give them a little push to go receive their due blessings. When all the mothers were gathered up in the altar, how lonely and grey did the crowd in the benches become. Little boys and girls sitting by themselves and ‘single’ males. Something was missing in the crowd—the motherly presence.

How dark would the world be without mothers? I got a small glimpse of it. Very dark and claustrophobically incomplete… Something more precious than the rarest diamonds would be missing in this world.

A world without mothers is not just an imagined reality. This apocalyptic reality has already struck many brothers and sisters in the world.

Feel the sorrow of the children and adults who lost their mothers during the Nepal earthquake, how dark has their world become? A sorrow weighting more than ten thousand buildings crashing upon the heart and surrounding it in hopeless darkness.

Feel the anger of the children who witness the raid and rapes of their mothers by those legal or illegal ‘soldiers’? How painful is it to see such depravity and not being able to stand up and protect your our mother? How can you forgive and forget these incidents?

Feel the shame of mothers who in order to prevent their children to starve are pushed to lives of prostitution? That entangling shame that keeps mothers trapped in prostitution rings in the limbo state of living-dead?

Feel the disappointment of mothers whose children can’t even take 5 seconds of their busy lives to show appreciation for their mother? How sad it is to sit in near the phone waiting for a long-awaited phone call from the children whom you gave your Life?

Ask yourself. Is your mother in your Heart?

My reply would be

‘My mother is

But we’re far apart

I hope you know

Dear Ma

Please forgive me

For flying away

Far away from the nest you made

One day

I’ll return

Bring you Love

That is long overdue

Stay strong

Stay healthy

I love you

You see this letter

Blossomed from within me

I have learned much

Seen much

Experienced much

In the end

We are all Free

We can meet

Anywhere

Here and there

As long as our Hearts connect…’

 

With Love,

The bird who flew away

Mind Laundry

Wash-Clothes-without-a-Washing-Machine-Step-8 Wikihow
Photo: Wash Clothes Without a Washing Machine Step 8, from Wikihow

I used to dislike doing laundry

Just had to put what’s ‘dirty’

Into the machine

And like magic

It would become sort of ‘clean’

 

Yet I felt too lazy

In my energy-saving world

My time was too important

To be spent doing laundry

I had better and bigger things to do

I had to find a way ‘to save the world’

So day-by-day the dirty clothes piled up

Soon it started to stink

And it reached the day

When I had no more clean clothes to wear

 

What to do?

I sat and reflected

I took a day off

Maybe two

I pushed through

And cleaned this mountain like pile of laundry

 

It took time

So exhausting yet rewarding

Then I decided to

Stop falling prey

To this consumerist machine

I decided to escape

To a place

Where I can wash my clothes

By hand…

Plus a bucket and a scruber

 

Now I don’t need a machine

To do my laundry

No pre-set programs

Just hands and a process

Weaving art and creativity

As long as it leaves the clothes clean

 

Wash, wash, clean

I tell myself

Sometimes I sing

Sometimes I remember

The Buddha’s message

To Suddhipanthaka

‘Sweep Clean’

Alas this disciple found Liberation

With these two ‘simple’ words

‘Sweep Clean’

People used to call him stupid

For he could not remember half a line of a verse

Arhats tried to teach him

But he could not remember

Until he internalized

‘Sweep Clean’

 

I used to think that

My clothes were clean

Until I discovered

The stench that I carried within

So I wash, wash, clean

I throw my dirty clothes

Into the water bucket

Cycle around and around

Twelve times to the right

Twelve times to the left

And thirty times up and down

Is it clean?

No, not yet

Fill another bucket of water

And throw it back again and cycle

 

Twelve times to the right

Twelve times to the left

And thirty times up and down

Is it clean?

No, not yet

So I throw it back again and cycle

I am still in the process of washing clean

I don’t know when

But one day these clothes will be cleansed

And its Owner shall exclaim

‘What a clean shirt!’

And He shall wear it!

 

But up until that day

I shall continue repeating

Wash, wash, clean

Is it clean?

No, not yet?

Then throw it back again into the bucket!

 

 

 

Let It Burn

Let it burnOur Lady of Rosary

In the fire of Heart

Let it burn

To Heavenly ash

Throw in whatever is dear

All your worries, attachments and fears

Hurl in your innermost cravings

All your wishes, desires and yearnings

Let it burn

Let it burn

Let it burn

Until Nothing is left unburned in your Soul

 

You will see

That everything catches fire

And burns to ashes

From food, friends and family

To the innermost pleasures and desires

From all egotistical notions and concepts

Of purity and defilement

Of holiness and sin

Of deficiency and perfection

You throw in anything that rises in the Mind

And it catches fire like dried Autumn grass

Let it burn

 

Let the Wind blow

Let it spread this fire of Heart

Towards the ten directions

Let it kindle lost hearts that stopped burning long time ago

Let it burn