Traveler or Dreamer?

Journeys

Part of my ‘growing up’ process has been accepting that there is “no happily ever after”… however I am also learning that there is no “unhappily ever after” either… hence as a temporary visitor I am free to fill all the time and space ‘in-between’ haha… with words?

 

Am I a traveler

Or a dreamer?

 

Space,

Time,

Restless mind?

 

Home?

Where is home?

Precious home of my dreams?

 

Am I dreaming?

Or am I travelling?

 

Images flow

Of mountains, rivers and trees,

Trains and planes,

Birds and cranes,

Scattering the boundless sky

Free finally free?

Or locked

in this cage of Dreams?

 

Perfect home family wealth success fame respect body pleasures satiated…

Is there an end to this stream?

 

With thirst,

Comes the journey

 

Fallen journeys

Leaf like memories

Dance with the wind

As winter comes

 

Seasons change

So do places, people and nature

So I sing,

 

Am I a traveler

Or a dreamer?

The Hypocrisy of In Between

In between worlds

I stand adrift in my little boat

In the vast ocean of samsara

~~~

Sometimes energetic

Sometimes lost and confused

Sometimes Oppressor

Sometimes Oppressed

~~~

Such is the hypocrisy

Of in between worlds

~~~

Denying the Oppressor

Denied by the Oppressed

Wearing Oppressor clothes

Eating Oppressor food

Venturing out to ‘serve’ the Oppressed

~~~

Such is the hypocrisy

Of in between worlds

~~~

It might be that

In the eyes of the Oppressed

I’m still the Oppressor

With a foolish smile

And foolish acts

What a foolish child!

It might be that

In the eyes of the Oppressor

I am an ungrateful child

That eats the food but does not repay back the kindness

~~~

Such is the hypocrisy of in between worlds

Alone, lost and confused

I stand adrift

In my little boat

In the ocean of samsara

~~~

The sail is torn

The mast is loose

The stern is cracked

The cracks are leaking

The boards are molding

~~~

Oh bodhicitta boat

Break not

Don’t break

Until we reach the Other shore

~~~

The egotistical fool in me

Thought I could ferry

The Oppressors and the Oppressed

In my little boat

Together

To the Other shore

How foolish!

How can the blind lead the blind?

Let go and find yourself the Way

Only then you can return to fetch

Those who are ready to depart

~~~

Oh bodhicitta boat

Break not

Don’t break

Until we reach the Other shore

~~~

The winds of time whisper

Ten years took Ulysses

To finally reach Home

See those mermaids

Beware

See those sorceresses and nymphs

Beware

Watch out for the one-eyed cyclope

The cannibals

Serpents

You’ll encounter them

Just take heed

Wondering sailor

~~~

All things are impermanent

Indeed

You’ll realize this

Sooner or later

The hypocrisy of in between worlds

Shall cease

Get hold of your little boat

Make repairs if you need

Look into the deep horizon

Can’t you see?

You are not alone

There are many bodhicitta boats

Adrift in the sea

You’ll soon meet them

You can sit, converse and chat

And continue journeying

Towards the Other shore

How Can I Not?

Time has passed by

Like a gust of wind

A bird gets ready to fly

Oh so hard it is

To say goodbye

 

Oh attachments

To home and not-home

 

Is it still home?

Where the heart still longs

For something

Timeless

Long gone

Truth?

 

It might be

That this precious Truth

Is right here

Next to me

How painful it is

That I can’t see?

 

Some people

Call it Love

But I can’t feel it

Perhaps a little sprout

Deeply planted

In layers and layers

Of illusive existence

 

How can I accept an illusory role

Prescribed by a system

Engineered to keep me

A passive victim

That blindly and silently

Follows

What others are expecting

‘Me’

To do?

 

What is ‘Me’?

I am my mother

My father

Brothers and sisters

Ancestors

Creators of my kinship

I am more than my blood

I am the tree that I used to love

I am the river that I used to swim

I am the clouds that I used to dream

I am earth mother desperately crying for help

I am heavenly father who gave me a soul and guides me with Love

 

How can I accept

Seeing ‘me’

All my loved ones

Trapped in illusion

Delusion

Karmic sea of Suffering?

 

How can I not

Attempt to find a way out?

 

How can I not?

Build a boat

Search and wander in the sea

To finally find a ferryman

Who agrees

To take me to the other shore

 

Oh that sweet home

Where the heart longs no more

Where home is here

There

Everywhere

Nowhere

At the same time

 

If I do reach my destination

You will see

That you are ‘me’

Simply Free

 

You will realize

That indeed

You have agency

To build your own boat

Search and wander

Meet your ferryman

And see ‘me’

On the other shore

 

True Home this is

Where the heart longs no more.

 

Story: A Bird Sets Flight (Part I)

A bird sets flight

From its warm, cozy family nest.

Its nest has become too small,

To fit its fully grown body.

Now its eyes can look beyond the nest.

Realizing how little it is,

And how vast is the world outside.

The bird’s heart has grown big,

Filled with illusive hopes,

Distorted dreams,

And skewed ideals.

Yet a tiny seed of enlightenment-wish slowly sprouted.

Witnessing much suffering around him,

The bird searched for a way to eternal Bliss.

 

Hahaha, haha, ha…

Other birds mocked and laughed at its hopes and dreams.

Labeling it as “stupid, naïve and idealistic.”

The more paternalistic bird relatives,

Told him to give up these ideals and simply go help out its bird parents.

Who labor everyday to bring nourishing food for you and your siblings.

How spoiled you are.

You haven’t experienced hardships in life, that’s why you hold these ideals.

Now go and work like all other birds.

 

Meanwhile the Wind gently caressed its rainbow colored feathers,

Inviting it to freely fly around the world.

Ignoring the other birds’ comments and remaining steadfast on its aspirations,

The bird contemplated:

Where shall I fly?

 

North?

To the Land of Water

Where the mythical Black Tortoise resides.

With its cold winters,

And life remains dormant like glacial lakes.

 

South?

To the Land of Fire

Where the legendary Vermilion Bird flies.

With its hot summers,

And life blooms like daisy flowers.

 

East?

To the land of Wood

Where the mystical Azure Dragon roams.

With its windy spring seasons,

And life sprouts like scented grass covered in dew.

 

West?

To the land of Metal

Where the fabled White Tiger lurks.

With its dry autumns,

And life withers like fallen leaves.

 

Or stay in the Center?

In the land of Earth

Where the legendary Yellow Dragon sits.

With its damp late summers,

And life ripens like sweet fruit.

 

Where to go?

 

A pure inner voice replied.

 

It’s all relative.

 

No external trip is worthwhile without an internal journey.

 

The purpose is to realize Being.

 

You little bird, like the pure hearted Tang pilgrim who journeyed West to fetch the Buddhist scriptures,

Will travel to where your Heart takes you.

Your path will not be easy.

You will face many hardships.

You will meet faithful travel companions who shall accompany you throughout your journey.

You will meet the fiery minded Monkey king,

The bodily attached Pig,

The emotional Friar Sand,

And the thinking Horse.

 

You will encounter and face demons,

Of all forms and shapes,

Snakes ,

Spiders,

Centipedes,

Tigers,

Bears,

Lions,

Foxes,

All disguised and ready to trick the unmindful traveler.

 

When you are in distress,

Pray for help.

I, the compassionate Bodhisattva Avalokiteshvara

Shall appear and with a gentle touch of the holy willow branch,

All negativity shall disappear;

Relieving all suffering,

Only leaving a trail of teachings on emptiness.

 

Get your swords of wisdom sharp!

Hold the prajna-paramita within your heart!

Morality clear!

Study the Scriptures and Sacred Texts!

Get ready for the journey!

 

Flap your wings o little bird!

And may you find the answers you seek and share them with all beings!

 

Guided by this pure voice,

The bird bid farewell to beloved family and friends.

It embarked in its prescribed journey.

Setting out into the cold, chaotic world.

 

The bird flapped its wings and its body took flight.

A body well fed and protected from physical suffering.

As it gained momentum,

The little bird was soon engulfed by the vast morning indigo sky.

The sun rose in the horizon,

The whole world seemed to be dancing in joy and excitement,

As bird’s life story slowly unfolded as if waking up from a dream.

 

This is the story of the bird that began its journey towards the other shore.

 

(To Be Continued…) Stay updated for the next blog entry. A heartfelt thank you for reading this. Hope you enjoyed it.

Poem: Deception

I aim to deceive You;

To deceive Me;

To deceive All;

In this dreamlike world.

 

I dress to deceive you,

Talk to deceive you,

Walk to deceive you.

All deceiving me;

Deceiving all;

In this interdependent world.

 

Did I almost deceive you?

With my want to be ‘poet-like’ usage of words.

Did I almost convince you?

That our fall to Death is Not happening right now.

 

Sorry.

Like a waterfall of lies,

I fall.

Dragging you with me

Into the noisy, turbulent currents below.

Powerful currents these are,

Always in motion,

These erratic currents,

These circular currents,

That push you and me playfully

Like children having fun with their Non-favorite toys.

 

We are not that special after all?

Are we?

Throwing us around.

Scratching our thin layers of paint.

Breaking our arms,

Our heads,

Until we are of no use anymore.

Then we are thrown into the bin marked “To Be Recycled.”

Isn’t there an end to this suffering?

 

Perhaps if I didn’t drag you with me

Down this waterfall,

You would be saved from this misery.

Perhaps you would feel compassion for me

And save me;

By throwing me a rope or something to lift me up.

Just like Monkey King,

Maybe together we can cross into the other side of the waterfall.

And find a cave filled with flowers and fruits.

No but he got tired of that luxurious lifestyle and journeyed West with the Tang monk.

Hm…then let’s just hope that one day,

We both can find our paths and walk it with Love.